4.21.2006

How to know if the guy you're dating is a bachelor...

I have been remiss in my blogging duties. I've had many things to talk about but just haven't had the time. Anyway, the following is a list of things bachelors do. Now don't assume these are all about me, they might be my roommate...

In no particular order, he's probably a bachelor if:
  • -his bathroom doubles as a library with an extensive array of periodicals
  • -there is no toilet paper...anywhere
  • -the only things in the shower are a bottle of suave and a bar of irish spring
  • -clothes are neatly arranged by level of smelliness in piles on the floor (Hmm, I could wear this at least once more...)
  • -the garbage can is huge yet somehow always full
  • -the living room couch has been handed down so many times no one remembers who actually bought it
  • -mail can be found almost anywhere, on a counter, on the stove, on the stairs, in a tree, in a box, with a fox...
  • -things like peanut butter and cereal become "dinner" foods
  • -cereal boxes invariable feature cartoon characters which are perhaps the reason they were purchased
  • -there is always beer but there is never any milk...ever
  • -the wireless phone is always mysteriously missing and never finds its way back to the charger
  • -no one knocks before entering the house
  • -there's a PS2 is in the living room
  • -the only furniture in the house is the previously mentioned couch from bachelors past, a coffee table so old, scratched, and stained it sits incognito under a tablecloth, and a recliner
  • -every light is always on, even in the daytime or during a supernova
  • -he can get dressed in any room including the kitchen and the sun room
  • -none of the windows have blinds, shutters, shades, or any other man-made device to keep people from seeing in
  • -he has his own blog he updates often

This is just a short list. Please feel free to add as you see fit.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

thats hilarious however if i remember correctly your ps2 is here lol but thats even worse if its your roomates considering hes way older than u haha!